Last night’s dream wasn’t all that extraordinary yet again, although I’d like to know what it meant. I’m a freak and sort of have this obsession with the meanings behind dreams. It always seems to be an eye opener to me on what I’m subconsciously thinking and what I should be realizing about myself. The subconscious mind is such a powerful thing to me because of how when we hear or see something, it’s always back there without us realizing consciously. Our actions tend to be on what we are feeling or thinking subconsciously. I mean when we are asleep we are at our perfect peace, perfectly balanced and relaxed so that is when those messages are sent to us by pictures and symbolism. It’s very interesting in my opinion when you realize this and use your power to have lucid dreams and control your subconscious mind and change yourself through it. I don’t know I’m strange but it keeps me occupied. Maybe, someone will read that and feel interested, weirded out, or bored but it’s what gets me amused and by considering I don’t do much.

The Dream- I only remember parts.. What I remember around the beginning was that I was at school and for some strange reason throughout the day I was sad, my mom was gone for some reason and my mom’s friend was taking care of us. Something happened to my parents and I didn’t know what. I’m guessing I dreamt that because of my fear of losing my mom, but while I was at school I was just sad and felt that they disappeared. During lunch period all the tables were full and I was all alone, my brother left me with his friends which was strange considering in reality we always eat only together because we don’t know too many people at school, so in the dream it was strange to me. I ignored the fact and was glad he made friends in the dream and when I looked at the tables every single one was full and I sat there searching if there was at least a chair and there wasn’t. All the chairs were blue and then I saw one black one alone in a corner. As I went to grab the chair some kids from my English class invited me to sit with them but when I came they all disappeared and I was left alone in an empty cafeteria. On the way home I remember being on a school bus which in reality I walk but on the bus everyone’s backpacks were empty and I had a very bookpacked backpack that was very heavy. My hands were full of books as well and when I got to the stop the bus door opened for my brother and when I tried to go through it shut on me and got stuck. When I came home my mom’s friend was there and told me she’ll be taking care of us for a while. In the dream I felt very lost, confused, vulnerable, and alone. She handed me a yellow prom dress and told me to put it on, that I was going to prom. She gave me a silver leaf pin to put on the dress. When I arrived to the prom everyone left and I was left alone, standing on the black pavement in a parking lot. All of the cars were there but no people. Then suddenly I was in a pool in my prom dress swimming away and there was an abandoned baby, this baby is the same baby that is always in random dreams of mine since I was about 8 years old. This baby always appears in my dreams alone, watching me, or abandoned, its strange. I saw the baby, laying on a green floaty (greens my favorite color too and it always has green or blue surrounding him) I took the baby and took care of it and at the end of the dream I felt unabandoned and happy. Then I took the baby in my arms, caring it and looking into his eyes, I stood up and walked out of the water into a bright light. I believe this baby is my savior from all of my pains or fears because the baby always makes me feel secure and appears in dreams that involve; fear, abandonment, or any negative feelings.

SYMBOLISM:

Empty

To be aware of emptiness, or to find something empty when you expected it would be full, suggests that you are contemplating some venture or activity which would turn out to be disappointing and a waste of effort. Don’t try anything unfamiliar for a while after you have this dream.

Black

Black symbolizes the unknown, the unconscious, danger, mystery and malice. If you feel happy in the dream, the blackness could imply hidden spirituality and divine qualities.

Chair

An empty chair signifies unexpected news. Sitting in a comfortable chair predicts comfort and easy times. A rocking chair foretells good luck - you will have positive gains without having to work for them (possibly an inheritance).

Cafeteria

Dreams set in a cafeteria suggest there may be a lot of issues “eating you up” inside.

Yellow

If the color yellow is featured prominently in your dream, you are now or will be soon experiencing a time of happiness and good energy.

Leaves

To see leaves in your dream signifies new found happiness and an improvement in your school grades or your job situation. If you see fresh green leaves in your dream, you will marry a rich man. To see brown or withered leaves in your dream signifies fallen hopes.

Pin

To dream that you are pricked by a pin, symbolizes a sticky situation or irritating relationship. You may be feeling anxious or feeling the need to hold together a certain unstable relationship. Or, to see pins in your dream may also suggest a feeling of being trapped, as exemplified by the phrase “being pinned down”.

Dress

To dream of having or buying an attractive new dress foretells good fortune in a social situation. This dream also symbolizes that you are embracing your femininity. To dream that you are wearing a white dress, suggests that you want to appear pure and angelic toward others. If you see or wear a prom/formal dress in your dream, you are good at using your female intuition to guide you.

Baby

To see a baby in your dream, signifies innocence, warmth and new beginnings. A love affair may be blooming for you in your near future. You will also make new and fun friends. Babies may symbolize something in your own inner nature which is pure. More “Baby” dream meanings:

If you dream of a crying baby, part of yourself that is deprived of attention and affection.

To see a dead baby in your dream symbolizes the ending of something that is part of you.

To dream of a talking baby means you need to listen to your inner child. Your subconscious has an important message for you.

If you dream of nursing a baby, you will be deceived by the one you trust the most.

If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities. You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses.

If you dream of having a baby with downs syndrome or retardation, you are having feelings of self-doubt. You are afraid of being left out or left behind. You may also be trying to avoid responsibility for something.

To dream that you have a false pregnancy (you think you are pregnant, but find out there is no baby), there is some aspect of yourself or your personal life that is changing, but you are not ready to talk about it yet. You may also be having trouble making a new personal goal or project happen.

Dreaming about a premature baby often symbolizes a newly developing relationship (or possibly a new creative idea) in your real life. You may have some anxiety about this new situation or relationship.

TO dream of a baby spitting up is a warning to be careful of who you trust. Someone who you count on could be deceiving you.

Pool

To see a swimming pool full of water in your dream is lucky, symbolizing that you will find much happiness and pleasure in friendship, love and marriage. An empty pool means trouble in love and friendship, or that you are not feeling enough affection in your life. If the pool contained muddy or dirty water, you are wallowing in your negative emotions. You need to devote some time to clarify your mind and find inner peace. This dream may also suggest that your thinking and/or judgment is unclear and clouded.

Prom

Proms in dreams represent celebrations, the “dance of life”, creation, new beginnings for romance, and going with what life has to offer you. If you dream that you are attending or going to a prom, it represents your attempts to achieve happiness. If you dream of having a bad time at the prom, you may lose a friend.

Parking Garage / Parking Lot

To dream that you are in parking lot suggests you need to slow down and take some time to relax. If you dream about not being able find a parking space, you are having trouble finding your place in life. You are still searching for your talent or the special niche where you belong.

Green

Green is the color of health and good fortune. It is a lucky omen in dreams

Floating Objects

Dreams about floating objects suggest that you are feeling a lack of connection or a need to become more grounded. Also see “Telekinesis.”

Abandoned / Abandonment

Dreams of abandonment sometimes represent real life (you recently broke up with someone or fought with a friend), or you fear these things. On the positive side, it can also mean you’re dropping old patterns and attitudes. To see an abandoned building in your dream suggests that your approach toward a situation or relationship is all wrong. You need to change. Your own self-image may have suffered and taken some blow.

Swimming

Dreams about swimming are related to the need to trust your instincts and look to past situations for answers to problems. They can also signify the need for nurturing or mothering in one’s life. Also see “Flippers”, “Swimming Lessons”, “Swimming Pool” and “Underwater”

Backpack

A backpack in a dream represents unfinished business. Part of it is your own, and part is stress you have on behalf of others. If the bag on your back becomes large and overly heavy, you’re carrying an unreasonable burden in real life.

Bus

To dream of a bus means you’ve been going along with the crowd and need to start acting on your own decisions. If you missed your bus in the dream, you may feel that others are leaving you behind socially or emotionally. You are having difficulty in achieving your personal goals. To dream that you are in a bus accident, signifies that you will find yourself in an embarrassing situation. Also see “Bus Driver” and “Bus Stop.”

Alone

To dream that you are standing alone, or feeling scared of being alone, symbolizes temporary and fleeting worries that will soon pass. You may feel that you don’t have a lot of support from friends and family when you have to go through a problem situation.

Door

To dream of having a door slammed in your face represents opportunities that are denied and not available to you, or that you have missed out on. You may be having some anti-social tendencies

Owls observe everything, they watch, they see just like me. The only difference between me and an owl is that they are much stronger. Owls keep things to themselves, as do I. They just have way more strength than I do. It’s such bullshit that I still cannot find that strength in myself. It’s really been ticking me off lately. I know I’m intelligent, I know I perservere, I know I have plenty of positive aspects and talent but I tell myself I don’t. I keep telling myself I’m just not good enough and I can’t figure out why I do this. I really need to push through my insecurities and find myself before I lose myself. I get told all the time that I have a strong mindset and a good head on my shoulders but why don’t I always believe it. I figured I don’t feel this way because I’m weak. I break down so easily but I hate showing it. It’s like everytime I feel positive about myself I scare myself away from that “good” feeling because I feel I don’t deserve it because I feel conceited. I know it’s not at all but maybe it’s because I strongly dislike conceited arrogant assholes and fear to ever be seen as one? I don’t know this was kind of a pointless blog but it was more of venting out as I’ve been doing all week. Anyways I think owls are very smart animals. They observe so much and symbolize a plethora of things. They’re pretty kickass since they can turn their heads all creepy as well. <3 haha, creepy I know, but I like weird and creepy. I love this quote that I saw applied to an owl, “We are all visionairies, and what we see is our soul in all things.”

I envy an infant’s fontanelle for the tender care received

The way a mother sculpts her hand so delicately and soothingly around its head

As if it were a bulb ready to shatter

With an instinct to have her fastest grip in case of a slip

The fontanelle is watched for closely unlike one’s soul

It’s not that a soul won’t always get the care

It just craves that lasting guardian there

Guaranteed to stay

Assured to guide it, protect it

For a soul does not carry that security

This realization causes me to fear

That I will never find that keeper that is meant to be found in me

The one that is invented to look over my soul

 Made to never let it crack,

Never let it drop,

Shield it from jagged corners,

Softly hold and pet the back of its head

I fear I’ll never find it and only get lost trying to look for the right way

So gentle and insecure

I fear I will lose myself on the way only further damaging myself

Walk the wrong road

Running into cracks, falling into ditches

Find a cold-hearted person to thrust its fingers into my fontanelle once again

Carelessly push down deeper and deeper

I hide away and put on this mask

Only to avoid true pain

All I long for is true happiness

I know that happiness is a mindset,

To truly be happy you must have this approach

But I do not know how to possess it

For there is too much evil crowding around

I do not know how to find this bliss I fake to hold

Its not that I am unhappy

Its that I’ve never been completely pleased

Everytime that I have felt so,

Something came in the way

Snatching away my pleasure

Like a kidnapper stealing a mother’s newborn

If only our souls came with a treaty

A promise

To have a forever defender

Then maybe I’d find true happiness

- Sandra Arnautovic

A conversation a very good best friend of mine and I had, it’s guaranteed to open your eyes to plenty of things. No joke, it’s long but makes way more sense than what people seek religion out to be.

Jeffrey:

Let’s just say there’s 4 occassions that made me believe in god nd miracles, but that’s a story 4 another time.

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1:20 AM

Sandra:

haha oh god religion, now dont get me started lol

thats the most confusing subject people argue with me

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1:21 AM

Jeffrey:

Ok, i won’t then…let’s just say that i believe nd i’l leave it at that. ND yes, ur right, u really don’t need a guy to live right now. Like i said, u let them come 2 u.  

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1:22 AM

Sandra:

i believe more that god is a positive mindset in us thats a good energy in everyone and everything but is more of a self protection and something to keep us feeling okay and safe, just a mindset and energy not a mirraculous person or anything like that.

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1:22 AM

Jeffrey:

Nd i’m pretty sure u’ll find the right guy ya know. But make sure that u stay focused first nd don’t let anything distract u.

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1:22 AM

Sandra:

i believe in a god, but more of a good energy rather than human or creature type of thing, i beleive we are our own god if we want to be

i know

when i t comes to guys and all im cool with it sure its lonely and sucks but its not too bad

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1:23 AM

Jeffrey:

LOL, that’s all good. I won’t argue with that….Dang, that’s deep

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1:23 AM

Sandra:

what?

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1:23 AM

Jeffrey:

the whole us being our own god, which is actually kinda logical.

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1:24 AM

Sandra:

yeah

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1:24 AM

Jeffrey:

But still, how could some not b their own god if they never had one to believe in in the first place ya know?

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1:27 AM

Sandra:

the only reason i believe that is because ive witnessed that, ive never witnessed a superior being that is bigger than all of us, the only thing bigger than us is ourselves and our possible way and mindset that we tell our selves to be, our biggest thing is our subconscious mind. thats the only thing saving us, guiding us, and protecting us right? in dreams every random object symbolizes something in our subconscious mind and when you are asleep is when you are at your complete peace where there arent distractions so it try to symbolizes it to us and hint it. so pretty much were out own god and if we dont believe in our selves then we havent found our god, and we are our own god only if we want to believe in ourselves. you dont have to have a god to believe in, in the first place. you have to find yourself to believe in yourself right? so youre your own god

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1:32 AM

Jeffrey:

True, that makes sense. While everything in ur subconcious mind symbolizes whatever we’re feeling, then yes, we can b our on god nd belive in what WE believe in….so if that’s the case….then if almost everybody believes in G-O-D, then doesn’t that mean that that energy might be a presence connected with everyone nd MAYBE that uncommon energy makes most belive in THAT G-O-D. Making us our own god?…..It makes sense! I kinda understand where ur coming from, cuz yeah, it adds a new meaning to “u can do ANYTHING if u put ur mind to it”…….I believe in myself nd work at something, therefore i accomplish it. If i belive in a certain idea or principle, then therefore it sticks with me…..

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1:33 AM

Sandra:

when you hope and pray to god, youre really just putting it in your subconscious mind to have hope and open your eyes to everything positive around you and ignore the rest, its not some miracle its just when you think of something or want something enough you get it cause its there subconsciously and consciously you dont notice it but you work around and change yourself because its there in the back of your mind subconsciously

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1:34 AM

Jeffrey:

but putting all that religious stuff aside, cudn’t u say that there is something uncoincidental if EVERYONE feels that same energy of one “made up” identity?

hmmm, that’s understandable……

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1:35 AM

Sandra:

hmm

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1:35 AM

Jeffrey:

?????

What?

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1:35 AM

Sandra:

but not everyone feels it or believes it

the question isnt who is god? its where does this energy come from

how is it in different substances in and around us

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1:37 AM

Sandra:

i believe in a higher power and that higher power is an energy i dont believe in god but i believe if there were a “god” it would be every source of energy combined

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1:38 AM

Jeffrey:

Yes, but if a majority does, or even a small amount of ppl do, then don’t u find that uncommon? I mean that’s how Christianity nd any other religion started….one believer, who STRONGLY believed in their religion….the most widely accepted one being christiabity. But still, i dont go 2 church but only blieve in god bcuz in our human history we have manipulated the bible to fit our own selfish human desires….so thus i only believe in god, nd i can GURANTEE u, that others subconcoiusky believe that as well. Nd at least a majority feel that uncommon energy of one presence that t

they subconcously put in their mind, nd also dub as “the holy ghost”.

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1:39 AM

Sandra:

but energy leads into science and molecules and stuff so how did those get there? well never know, not even after we die probablly. hah after death is a whole nother story i believe, not heaven none of that. well more like a permanent dream state thats when were unconcscious we dream, we dont feel pain or anything just dream, you cant explain that how come we dream so maybe after we die we dream and feel that perfect peace you get when youre unconscious sleeping

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1:39 AM

Jeffrey:

IDK, but that’s my perspective on it, but i could agree with u on ur view point as well….

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1:41 AM

Jeffrey:

YES!! YES!!! U were right about God maybe being an energy bcuz no one EVER said he had 2 b a person!! That’s what tribes nd stuff feel!!!! Like in Avatar! He or it. the energy, doesn’t have to be a person. But maybe a fllowing constant energy felt in the earth nd us!

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1:42 AM

Sandra:

i believe that too, the bible was changed around so much it became stories and crap and those stories all lead back to and symbolize energies and basic logical principles. the holy ghost i think is our mindset and subconscious mind and our subconscious mind in a way is like an energy. its like the ruler of all energies cause its the one we dont control so i guess that is our god. viewpoints and such are the energies and mindsets are too that we can control and change

EXACTLY!

thats EXACTLYYYYY what i believe

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1:42 AM

Jeffrey:

OOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

……..dang

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1:44 AM

Jeffrey:

See idk, but i believe science nd religion go hand in hand. we make out what we want 2 believe, nd so does that ENERGY we all feel.

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1:45 AM

Sandra:

i tell people that all the time and they argue with me but thats something that has tons of backup and support to it than stories like noah and the ark and crap maybe the first human had a dream, his subconscous mind or “god” so to speak dreamt out this story, he wrote it out and people manipulated it such as rumors. but the stories all had symbolism like rivers and allthose things have strong symbolim and meanin and if you notice the stories connect dots to logical thinking and things humans should and shoudnt do or mistakes we make

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1:45 AM

Jeffrey:

Heck, everyone all believs in some sort of presence on earth’s environment that makes ghosts, energy channels, nd other miraculous, or weird things on earth happen.

yeah, no kidding eh?

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1:48 AM

Sandra:

yeah and the energy can make sense if the highest strongest energy is known as “the holy ghost” then human ghosts maybe dont exist but energyghosts do, if there is too much energy in someone or something it makes it act out uncontrollably so if a “holy ghost” or great controlling energy enters a chair, it explains it moving. since scientifically proven energy is in everything so maybe there is too much of it in a chair and all the molecules and atoms are goin bazerk in it making it move. makes more sense eh?

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1:48 AM

Jeffrey:

But who knows how all that stuff REALLY happened? Science, nd professors were never really that to witness those occurrences. But i do know that science did play a role in that evolution of history nd the world. Which brings us back to that energy we put in our mind nd as to whether we choose to believe it or not.

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1:48 AM

Sandra:

yep

did i maybe change your belief in a way?

not so much change it but open your eyes to a deeper more connected way

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1:49 AM

Jeffrey:

OOOOOHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! COOL! I think we’re onto something.

Yes u did. did I change urs?

Or open?

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1:49 AM

Sandra:

you opened my eyes and got my brain going deeper into it

My parents friend’s dog has been staying with us for like a week now. As I’m just sitting here, bored on the computer while I should be sleeping, I hear kicking or some weird noise and thought the dog was humping the ground or a pillow or something and I look over and he’s sleeping and snoring like a human, kicking his legs as if he were running with his tail wagging? So I sat there like a creeper staring at him and he got up and started running in circles in place? Strangest thing I swear. It got me thinking that dogs are a lot more like us than I thought. I wonder what they dream about? I wonder what he was dreaming about? I’m guessing something in the lines of bacon and flower fields with chesty looking poodles.

So last night, well technically it was early morning. I only slept about 45mins. I had a dream that my friend which I just remember as a black shadow, stole a black Buddha(not the typical big bellied one, Siddhartha Gautama - the first Buddha) necklace from a village market with no people in it, it was oddly empty and people were in all the other stores, only the clerk was there staring at us and the shadow “friend” put it on me saying, “It calls your name”, it was pretty random but let’s see what it means. I remember reading that if you dream of Buddha it means something important? It’s not one of my crazy random dreams like midget panda armies carrying me over a river and chanting and carrying buckets with Grace’s face and wheat straws in the buckets, but hey I told myself I’ll write on here as much as possible.

• Black:

Black symbolizes the unknown, the unconscious, danger, mystery and malice. If you feel happy in the dream, the blackness could imply hidden spirituality and divine qualities.

• Buddha:

To see Buddha in your dream symbolizes wisdom, insight, compassion, and inner spirituality.

• Necklace:

To dream that a loved one puts a necklace around your neck means an early marriage filled with love. If you dream of losing a necklace, you will experience sadness over a loved one.

• Shadow

If you dream that your shadow acts differently than you do, you are not letting others see all parts of your personality. If the shadows in your dream were not your own, this suggests that there is an aspect of yourself that you are rejecting or want to keep hidden.

• Steal / Stealing:

If someone steals something from you in your dream, you are feeling a lack of emotional understanding or appreciation in your life. If you dream of stealing from a person or place you know, that is where you should look to for the emotional fulfillment you have been needing. Other dreams about stealing money means someone you are interested in is not paying attention to you. Also see “Stealing a Boyfriend”, below.

• Village:

To dream that you are in a village represents restrictions. It may also indicate that you are unsophisticated, but well-balanced. Alternatively, it signifies community, simplicity, and tradition.

• Market:

To dream about being in a market suggests that you are need of nurturing. Some emotional or physical need is missing in your life. If the market was empty and deserted, your need for fulfillment is especially keen.

Some days I long for the feeling of being set free like this bird ^^

I get so confused of my emotions that I feel numb. It’s not that I’m unhappy but more that I’m lost and unsatisfied. Sometimes I am unhappy but only because I don’t know how to put positive thoughts in my head. I’m incredibly insecure and confused most days. It’s not apparent but I’m aware of it and it gets so annoying. How do I set myself free like this bird and get out of the cage that is my pessimistic thinking?